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Archive for the ‘Coaching’ Category

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Just Pick Up the Phone!

Tuesday, October 5th, 2010

Recently a client of my expressed his frustration about how his coworkers use email.  He had received a misinformed email message that, of course, was copied to a few critical people which in turn created a time consuming drama that could have been resolved in minutes.   The email was about a safety issue (an electric shock hazard) at a large company. Allegedly someone had gotten shocked.  Wouldn’t you agree that an issue like that warrants a phone call?  It’s like emailing an ambulance when someone is having chest pains! Or sending a letter to the fire department when a house is burning!  Where is our common sense and what have we come to?  Why are we so reluctant to engage in live communication?  The reason I hear most frequently relates to time.  It’s quicker.  But understand, quicker isn’t always better.  When it comes to communication, use the tool that is most appropriate.
In the business arena email can be a very useful too when:

¨      You need a simple answer to a question

¨      You want to share information

¨      You want to make sure everyone on your team is informed

¨      You want to introduce an idea for someone to mull over

¨      You want to set up or confirm an appointment or meeting

Avoid using email when:

¨      You are angry or frustrated with the recipient

¨      You are angry or frustrated with a situation

¨      The issue is a sensitive subject to the recipient

¨      The information is highly confidential

¨      The topic is critical or time sensitive

¨      It’s an emergency

These are just a few of my thoughts.  If you have any other ideas to add, feel free to comment.

Clear communication is tricky business. So when in doubt, go see the person live or just pick up the phone!

Tags: Communication, email, phone
Posted in Coaching, Leadership | No Comments »

From Boas & Bunnies to Management & Motivation

Wednesday, September 22nd, 2010

Do What You Love!

As a child, people always ask, what do you want to be when you grow up? My first choices were Secret Agent or Royal Mounted Policewoman.  Both sounded exciting and of course riding a horse as part of a job was very appealing.  Over the years my responses would change some, but one thought always remained constant.  What ever I did, I always wanted my job to be fun and interesting.  I am happy to report that this is still true.

I began my career working with animals and children in the area of education.  I had the incredible opportunity to work at science and nature centers with a wide variety of animals ranging from spiders and snakes to skunks and squirrels. In this role I created interesting and engaging programs for children instilling both knowledge and appreciation for animals.   I can still remember walking into classrooms with a 6 foot Boa Constrictor wrapped around my waist.  Now that’s what I call active learning!  Never a dull moment and I loved what I did.

After seven great years in that field I was ready for a change.  I had always been fascinated by hotels and resorts, so I decided to explore the industry.  As luck would have it, I landed a great opportunity with a Hilton Hotel, first as a management trainee and then as an HR manager.  This was the start of a rich career in human resources and the catalyst that would eventually propel me into becoming a business owner, a coach and leadership development consultant.

Although my work environment and career have changed quite a bit over the years, my passion and focus remain constant.  In the past, I spent my workdays teaching, developing and inspiring children – today I do similar things, but my audiences are now adults and my tools have changed from spiders and snakes to assessments and power point.  Whether I am coaching a manager, working with a team or facilitating a team building adventure, I still love what I do!

So my question to you is … do you love what you’re doing?  Do you get up each day excited about what lies ahead?  If the answer is yes… then congratulations!  You’re on the right track.  If the answer is no, maybe it’s time to rethink things. Take a moment and rate the statements below on a scale of zero (not true at all) to 10 (perfectly true) .

(    ) I enjoy my career and the work I perform
(    ) My work allows me to express my unique talents and gifts
(    ) My work environment is positive and motivational
(    ) My Boss is respectful and treats me well
(    ) I have a plan for my career development
(    ) I earn what I am worth

Total: (      )

A perfect score is 60!   How did you do?

If you‘re not happy with your current “work life” situation consider hiring a coach.   A coach can help you gain clarity on what you want to change or improve, identify goals and create strategy for your next steps.   For more information on our Coaching Services, email me at anita@thecoachingcompass.com or give me a call at 949-387-3436.

Tags: animals, Career, Coaching, development, inspiring, Leadership, motivation, training, work
Posted in Coaching | 2 Comments »

Is your Glass Half Full or Half Empty?

Wednesday, August 18th, 2010

Today I am speaking for 70 unemployed professionals on how to stay motivated during a job search.  Being on a job search can be like riding a roller coaster; the ups and downs can be pretty extreme.  One moment you have 2 or 3 great opportunities on the table and a week later you can feel like you’ve hit ground zero – no opportunities – nothing on the horizon.  It can be very frustrating.  I don’t care how positive of a person you think you are, you’re human and we’ve all been there.

To help people maintain a positive mental attitude during a job search I have created The Mindset Makeover.  These are good habits to incorporate into your life whether you are unemployed or not.

The Mindset Makeover
Ten Tips for staying energized and positive during your job search

1. Begin your Day with Appreciation -The way you start your each morning sets the mood and tone for the rest of the day.  So as you wake up, take a moment to reflect on what you appreciate in your life.

2. Build a Schedule – By building yourself a schedule you will be able to approach each day with purpose and balance.  When you create that schedule, be sure to include not just job search time, but time for exercise, self development, family, friends and fun. The more balance you create, the better you’ll feel.

3. Take a Day Off – It is so easy to work your job search 24/7.  Give yourself permission to take a day off.  You will be more effective and refreshed when you do.

4. Focus on your Health – Exercise regularly and eat healthy. Besides being good for you, there are definite benefits from a mood and energy perspective. Try to schedule a minimum of 30 minutes of exercise into your day, don’t skip meals and avoid junk food.

5. Fertilize your Brain – Avoid the TV trap. Do things that keep you mind engaged and sharp.  Read books & magazines, take a class, listen to music & audio CD’s and engage in stimulating conversation with others.

6. Get Out of the House – A change of scene is always a good stimulus for igniting your energy and attitude.  Add some human interaction into the equation and watch you mood climb.  You are on a job search, not sentence to solitary confinement!

7. Find the Freebies – They say the best things in life are free.  Explore the many free things that are out there to do.  Concerts in the park, beach walks, street fairs and picnics are just a few of the free and fun activities you can tap into.

8.  Help Others and Volunteer – Helping people is a great way to energize you while making a difference in the lives of others. It can also open doors to new connections and possibilities for your future.

9.  Silence your Inner Critic – Negative self-talk propagates fear and inhibits action. When you hear that inner voice trying to sabotage your success, stop it dead in its tracks.  Awareness is the first step.

10. End your Day with Gratitude -What went well today?  What are you grateful for?  Create a Success Journal to help you recognize the positive actions you have taken and the successes you have achieved.

What 3 actions will you take going forward to insure maintaining a positive mental attitude?

1.____________________________________________________________________

2.____________________________________________________________________

3.____________________________________________________________________

Tags: motivation, positive mental attitude, unemployed
Posted in Coaching, Uncategorized | No Comments »

Leadership At The Improv!

Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010

Recently I began taking an Improv Class through my town’s community   programs.  This is my 3rd class in the past year.  I guess you could say I’m hooked.  When I’m in class, I feel like I am 9 years old again playing with my friends.   Last night, I was transformed into a Hula Dancer with a lisp and then to a one-legged Russian Spy with top secret toothpaste.  I have finally found a place where it’s acceptable to “make things up” on the fly and be respected for being silly, creative and thinking out of the box.  So what does all this have to do with leadership?  How can mastering improvisation skills help you as a leader?  Improvisation is a useful tool for leaders on many levels.

Practicing Improv sharpens your communication skills. It forces you to listen closely to the other people so you can play off of each others cues.  In addition, it promotes the acceptance of other people’s ideas and challenges you to work with the information they provide.  In business your ability to listen fully and be open to others ideas is critical. By accepting feedback, you encourage others to want share their ideas more freely.  You may not choose to implement the ideas offered, but you openness to listening will drive communication and the sharing of information

Improv stretches your creativity and encourages the development of on the spot thinking. When was the last time you had to think on your feet and respond to a question you were not expecting?  Maybe it was at a team meeting, during a presentation, with a client or perhaps a conversation with your boss.  Everyday we are faced with situations that require on the spot thinking. Improv exercises and strengthens  our “creativity” and “quick thinking” muscles.  If you want to “stay in shape” you work out to stretch and get strong.  The brain may not be a muscle, but it still improves with exercise.

Making decisions and embracing risk is critical in leadership and management. An organization can not move forward if its leaders are afraid to make decisions.  Improv requires participants to make decisions and take risks.  When playing a scene, deciding whether you want to be a cowboy or a mad scientist waiting at a bus stop with a nun may not be an earth shattering decision to make, but none the less, there you are in front of your audience, forced to commit to your role.  It takes courage and trust. What a great exercise in commitment and decision making!

Improv is the ultimate teambuilding experience. It requires the players to communicate, cooperate and trust each other.  The more you know your team mates, the easier it is to do a successful scene.  One of the golden rules in improv is that you want to try to make the other person look good.  It’s not all about you.  Imagine if we could work with others with that goal in mind… to make others be successful!  Wouldn’t that make a huge impact in team effectiveness, attitude and efficiency?

So call me silly, crazy or quirky, I am convinced that Improv builds great leadership qualities.  If you are looking to sharpen you game, try playing at Improv.  I promise you it will be fun and you won’t be disappointed.  And if you’d like to improve the communication and leaderships skills of your team, consider having The Coaching Compass facilitate “Acting Up” our Improv Teambuilding program.  Click here to read about it.

Tags: Communication, Improv, Improvisation, Leadership, teambuilding, trust
Posted in Coaching, Leadership | 1 Comment »

Networking Tips

Monday, July 19th, 2010

From time to time , I am asked by clients or organizations to speak on various topics.  This week I have the privilege of speaking to a local university’s medical center staff on Networking Skills.  Preparing for the program really got me thinking about the relationships I have cultivated and  nurtured over the years.  I have always been fairly good at relationship building, but it wasn’t until I became a business owner that I really understood the value of networking.  Networking is about helping other people get what they need.  It’s about sharing both your knowledge, expertise  and connections to help others be successful.  It is not about “what’s in it for me” nor is it a “quid pro quo”, mentality, but the rewards are generally plentiful and often surprising.  Through networking, I have gotten job opportunities, found new clients,  taken classes, made new friends, explored new hobbies, found service providers and traveled to some interesting destinations ( including Costa Rica, Hawaii & possibly to Europe in the near future).  And now that I am in the market for a dog …!! arff arff, I am sure my networking connections will help me find the perfect new pup.

So in the spirit of growing your network, I wanted to share with you my Seven Strategies to Networking Success.  Whether you are looking for a job, trying to grow a business or just increase your professional connections, these Seven Tips can help you along the way.  Enjoy!

1.  Be Yourself / Authentic
Remember you are your personal brand.  People want to do business with (or help) people who are “real” or authentic. They do not want to do business with phony people.  When you come across as authentic , building trust and developing solid relationships occurs more easily.

2. Be Approachable
Be conscious of your body language, facial expressions (SMILE!!) and your attitude.  Find a CPI  (common point of interest) and connect with people on a friendly and personal level.

3. Be Visible & Make it Fun
Get out of your office/home and meet people. Choose  venues that you enjoy (live networking events, social media, volunteering, social gatherings) to make the process more comfortable and fun.

4. Be Helpful
Develop a “give first attitude.”  What can you do for others?When you give of yourself first, you will reap infinite returns.

5. Be Clear on Your Purpose
Know what you are looking to get out of the networking process. Is it education, contacts, job leads, sales leads, volunteer opportunities?  This will help you be prepared and maximize your experience.

6. Be Prepared
How will you present yourself?  Create a 30 second personal commercial that will help you communicate effectively the information you want to share.  Bring your tools (business cards, info collateral).

7. Follow Up & Follow Through
Follow up quickly when you make an connection, Stay connected with people you really want to cultivate relationships with.   If you offer to help by sending information or making an introduction do it!

Tags: job hunting, jobs, Networking, Professional Connections
Posted in Coaching | 1 Comment »

The Truth About Goals

Monday, June 28th, 2010

You can’t reach your goal if you never set one. Recently I was reminded of this fact.  My husband is an extraordinary 8th grade history teacher in South Central Los Angeles.  His   students love him as he brings history alive both in and out of the classroom.  Just this year he won the secondary school, Teacher of the Year Award for his school district.  But this accomplishment is not the goal I want to address today.  The story I have to tell is about Poker; a game of patience and skill as well as some good luck.

For almost 5 years my husband has studied videos, read books, played Texas Hold’em regularly.  He is passionate about the game and is fascinated by the science of the game and the psychological strategies employed.  After about a year of playing with friends and in local tournaments, he announced, “One day, I will play in the World Series of Poker and win big money.”  I replied of course you will, only half believing him, but not wanting to burst his bubble.   When he made the comment, I thought it was about as viable as “Someday I will win the lottery.”  Well last week my husband proved to me that when you have a goal, believe it is possible and work hard to get there, it will happen.  He entered the World Series of Poker, event#34 ten days ago.  He went up against 3142 poker players from around the world – and made it to the final table (a huge accomplishment in itself).  In the end he finished in 8th place and won over $47,000.  Truly amazing!

I wanted to share this story as a reminder that if you don’t dare to think big and set goals your accomplishments will be few and minor.  It all starts with a vision.  Rather than share with you the typical goal setting strategies, I wanted to share an idea and keep it really simple.  Ask yourself, “What do I really want?”  Once you are clear on “the what” it’s as easy as ABC or should I say CBA to make it a reality.  Here’s what you do:

Conceive the idea.  Think about what you want, why you want it and what it will mean for you when you achieve it.  Get excited and feel the emotion.  Anticipate your success.

Believe that it is possible.  For any goal to manifest, you have to believe not only that it is possible, but that you are capable and worthy of achieving and receiving your success.

Achieve your goal by taking the necessary actions.  Just wanting something or believing it is possible is not enough to make it happen.  Create your plan and do the work. Be accountable to yourself. Overcome the obstacles and embrace the opportunities. Set reasonable time frames and celebrate your success.

So whether it’s a personal dream or a professional goal, you have the power to make it happen.  You have everything to gain and nothing to lose.

Tags: Accomplishment, Achievement, Goals
Posted in Coaching, Leadership | No Comments »

Is Anybody Listening?

Tuesday, May 25th, 2010

Recently I heard a thought provoking quote that speaks volumes about listening.

“People don’t listen to what you say.
People listen to what they say to themselves about what you say.”

Think about it.  When someone is talking to you, what are you thinking?  About something similar you did once?  About something related that you want to tell them?  A question you want to ask?  Or perhaps you are judging their remarks, behavior or even values.  The bottom line is that much of what is said is rarely heard completely, but rather filtered, dissected, manipulated and then absorbed by the listener. So it’s no surprise when you hear statistics around listening and the lack of understanding that takes place.  Here are a few interesting stats compiled by the International Listening Association (www.listen.org).

  • Most of us are distracted, preoccupied or forgetful about 75% of the time we should be listening.
  • We listen at 125-250 words per minute, but think at 1000-3000 words per minute.
  • Immediately after we listen to someone, we only recall about 50% of what they said.
  • More than 35 business studies indicate that listening is a top skill needed for success in business.

As a leader, listening skills are critical. A good leader has the ability not only to listen and comprehend what has been said, but to also make people feel heard through empathetic and authentic dialogue.  This is not always the easiest thing to do, especially when working under pressure with multiple priorities.

As a coach, I make being a good listener a priority.  Here are a few tips I subscribe to that can help make you a better listener.

  1. Be ready and open to listening. If your mind is on a thousand other things you will have trouble focusing on what is being said. Set up  a future time to talk if the timing is bad.
  2. Listen without judgment. Approach listening with an open mind.  If you have already decided on your response before hearing the person out fully, you have done yourself and the listener a disservice.
  3. Listen to understand, not to respond.  Effective listening goes beyond hearing someone’s words. Get the gist of what is being said. Avoid the trap of figuring out your response while the other person is talking.
  4. Be quiet.  Being quiet gives you the opportunity to hear the words, the tone, and the meaning behind the words. It also gives you the chance to observe the speaker’s body language and emotion.
  5. Let people finish their thoughts.  In other words, don’t interrupt the speaker. When you interrupt someone, they can forget part of their intended message and not fully express the idea they wished to convey.  This in turn alters the intended message.
  6. Give your full attention to the speaker.  Whether you are on the phone or listening in person, it is essential to give the speaker your full attention.  That means you are not answering emails, playing with your blackberry or shuffling papers.  If you are having a live conversation, maintain eye contact, lean forward and show interest.
  7. Ask questions to ensure understanding
    Just because you heard the words and observed the body language, don’t assume that you understand. If a particular point is unclear to you, ask a question to clarify it before you respond.  Sometimes your questions will clarify a point for the speaker as well.

Tags: comprehension, Listening, listening statistics, listening tips, understanding
Posted in Coaching, Leadership | No Comments »

The Lone Manager

Tuesday, May 11th, 2010

A couple of weeks ago I was working with a client who was having time management challenges.  We began our coaching session discussing the many tasks on his plate and the “time robbers” that just seemed to be gobbling up his time.  As we dug a little deeper it became apparent that he was suffering from a common leadership condition I affectionately call, the Lone Manager syndrome.  This is a when leader takes on more projects and tasks than necessary; specifically projects which actually should be handled by his or her team.  This in turn affects his/ her ability to manage their day to day priorities and leadership responsibilities.   The end result is a reduction in effectiveness, an increase in frustration and a management team with accountability & performance issues.  The good news is that with awareness and a commitment to modify one’s behavior, the Lone Manage Syndrome is completely treatable and curable.

Let me break it down. There are several core issues that tend to be at the root of the Delegation Issue: Control, Time, Trust. Confidence and Accountability

Some leaders have a very hard time with delegation.  It’s not that they don’t want or need the help, but they justify taking on the task because:

  • It’s easier to do themselves than train or explain to someone else (Time)
  • No one can do it a well as them (Trust & Confidence)
  • The end result will be exactly what they want (Control)
  • They can’t trust others to follow through or do it right  (Confidence & Accountability)

You understand why you take on more than you should, and you probably recognize that it’s not the healthiest style of management, but do you realize the negative impact your behavior can have on others?  When you take on more than you should, you limit the growth of others on many levels: the learning and mastering of new areas, responsibility, accountability and leadership just to name a few.

So what do you do?  Improving your delegation skills or changing your style doesn’t occur over night.  It’s a process that begins with increased awareness.  To you get you started, complete my delegation awareness assessment below.

1.  My biggest barrier to delegation is:  Circle one or more

Time         Trust         Control           Confidence         Accountability

2.  Based on my answer above, one thing I could do to reduce or eliminate the barrier would be…

3.  Right now I am handling a project that is either someone else’s responsibility or should be delegated to someone else.  It is …

4.  If I look at my current workload and the resources available to me, I could  delegate to others ( circle)

1 or 2 projects                   2- 4 Projects                       4-8 Projects

5.  When I delegate to others and hold them accountable, what kind of message am I sending as a leader?

6.  What actions can I begin taking to become less of a “Lone Manager”?

Just for fun, check out our recent interview with the Lone Manager!  Click the Youtube Link Below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFtv9Tt1HN0


Tags: accountability, delegation, management, trust
Posted in Coaching, Leadership | No Comments »

Kangaroo Leadership

Saturday, April 24th, 2010

I just got back from Australia 10 days ago and the experience still lingers in my mind.  Being an “animal science graduate” I just loved watching the amazing animals.  The Koalas were sweet, adorable as one might expect, while the Fairy Penguins were somewhat comical as they waddled up the beach in their neatly starched tuxedos in  the dusky moonlight.  Even the stick insects, yes stick insects, were incredibly interesting creatures with camouflage so perfect you would never spot them unless someone  pointed them out.  They really look just like a twig.
But, I have to admit, the Kangaroos were the best!  A group of males I observed were playful and aggressive; pushing each other in the chest and literally boxing.  These were not trained Kangaroos, they were wild, but enclosed in captivity.  When one would push, the other would push back. ( see video below that my husband Carlos took – we spent a 1/2 hour watching them…I couldn’t drag him away!)

I’ve seen this same kind of  “push back” behavior among managers and their  peers;  in hotels, in hospitals and on leadership teams in general.  Not in the physical sense, but in conversations or during meetings.  The concept of “pushing back” when you don’t agree is sometimes  necessary when stakes are high and the outcome is critical.  But as is true with most personal traits, when taken to the extreme, it can become aggressive and cause others to shut down, become frustrated and potentially lose respect.  Knowing how to balance your strength and power as a leader is extremely important and having an awareness of how to “pick your battles” is key.  It is not necessary to go to the mat on every issue.  Next time you have a strong opinion and the urge to push back, consider your response before speaking.  Separate yourself from your emotions and take a moment to listen to the other person. Try to hear what they are saying.   Ask yourself what the real goal is?  Is my approach going to be successful with this person?  Is there a better approach?  Just taking the time to think things through before speaking can be very beneficial.  Give it a try and see what happens!

Tags: conflict, emotions, hospitals, hotels, Kangaroos, listen, managers, push back, strength
Posted in Coaching, Leadership | 1 Comment »

Cats, Clients and Popular Opinion

Thursday, April 15th, 2010

My cats and my clients have many things in common: sharp instincts, independence, cleverness, motivation, curiosity and a spirit of adventure!  Sometimes I wish I could give my clients some of the other notable traits of my feline friends.

Let’s take patience, for example.  Have you ever watched a cat watching her prey?  Cats are so patient and precise, waiting for the absolute best moment to seize their prize.  Don’t you sometimes wish you could be that patient and precise?   Or how about confidence?  That can be a tough one for many of us.  Observe a cat as he walks on the edge of a high railing or jumps from a tree branch.  Felines never second guess their steps.  They know what they are capable of and just do it!

I have to say, one trait I think we could all use a small dose of is cats’ ability operate free from judgment.  They do what they want, when they want and they really don’t care if you like it.  Now I will agree, too much indifference and independence can be a problem in getting along in society, but a small amount might be nice.

Take a moment and think about the last important personal decision you made.  Did you get feedback from others before making the decision?  If so, did other people’s opinions steer you into making a choice that wasn’t what you really wanted?  Getting feedback and other perspectives can be very helpful when making choices, but the bottom line is that it’s your decision to make …so when you think you’ve decided what to do …ask yourself  “what would you do if you were the cat?”

I know this might sound silly, but it’s just another perspective to consider.  Why not give it a try?

Tags: decision making, instincts coaching, judgement
Posted in Coaching | 2 Comments »

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